Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
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