everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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