I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
