i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
