What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
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