YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
