Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
