yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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