I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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