yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
