Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
