C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
We were destined to go to rehab together
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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