All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
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