i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
