Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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