there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
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