i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
