You just made me feel so damn special
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
