Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
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