No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
