Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
