I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
