4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
