I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Randomize