Cold hands, warm shart.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
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