I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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