Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
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