can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
