Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
