I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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