Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
