Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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