Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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