9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
