Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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