I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
