Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
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