Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize