help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
