i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
