So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
