erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize
