i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize
