don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Randomize