I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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