TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
