I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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