Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
You took a bar mat shot.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
