He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
