you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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